LadyNaija just said:

How to respond if your ex texts you out of the blue

Recently, my sister’s ex reached out to me out of the blue. 

To say that I was shocked is an understatement. Considering the way he had suddenly broken up with my sister, there was a rush of emotions and then, I thought of her. If I was feeling that way, I wondered how she would have felt if he had contacted her instead.

I understand that getting a blast from the past like that can throw you off your balance. So, how do respond?

1. Evaluate how you two left things

I believe that the way things ended between you two largely determines whether or not you should respond to his text in the first place. If the breakup was amicable then responding in a friendly way is definitely on the table. If things were not so great, then you don’t even have to respond at all.

2. Evaluate your feelings

Don’t be consumed by his feelings, wondering, ‘How would he feel if I said….’. Now that you two have broken up, you should be more focused on your feelings and doing what helps you maintain your peace of mind. If you don’t feel threatened by him then you can respond.

3. Be polite

If you decide to respond because you feel it is safe enough, then keep your responses polite but not too friendly. Remain cautious until you can figure out what he wants. Don’t flirt; he may already be engaged and only be trying to ask for someone’s phone number.

4. Ask what he wants

If he keeps texting you and the conversation is not making headway, ask directly what’s up and why he has reached out to you. 

5. Restrict the conversation

Once he states his intentions, sort it out so you can move on. If he is merely trying to catch up, then ensure that the conversation remains in safe territory. Don’t rehash past fights; go over feelings (especially if either of you is with someone else) or talk about present relationships.

6. Don’t meet up

I strongly advise against meeting up, especially if you have moved on. Even if you are hoping to rekindle the relationship, meet in a public place and tread carefully. 

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TaRaRaE Sep 16

sha it is'n that good or bad

Prayojay Sep 16

Talking to yur ex is nt a bad thing.... I mean yu both ain't enemies 4 cry out loud sake.

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Mac19581958 Sep 15

U must not have anything to discuss with ur ex bcos he / she left u for another person.

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johnmaria1992 Sep 15

you ex is not your enemy stop making him/her look like one..yes I ended prematurely doesnt mean it shouldn't have ended well

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